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These Celebrity Liquors Ranked While Others Just Didn’t

Apparently, Post Malone makes a quality rosé, but Brad Pitt’s pink blush isn’t worth the cost. Who knew?

The personal finance editors at money.co.uk gathered together their years of collective knowledge sipping on celebrity-endorsed spirits to put together a roundup of the best-fermented fuel for your wallet. Editors determined the average cost of 85 celebrity-endorsed wine and liquors, then compared it with taste ratings to generate a list of which bottles offered the most bang for the buck. Let’s run through a few of the highlights.

An assortment of liquor bottles line a bar shelf.

Rounding out the top three were Idris Elba’s Champagne and rosé, Sarah Jessica Parker’s sauvignon blanc, and the aforementioned Post Malone rosé made the top three while Drake’s and David Beckham’s whiskeys found themselves at the bottom of the barrel.

The multitalented Elba, whose work includes parts in The Wire, The Office, Beasts of No Nation, Mandela, and many more, teamed up with Frenchman and wine expert David Farber. The pair met in 2018 at the Sanger viticultural school in Champagne, France, which eventually resulted in the Porte Noire winery. After the first bottles of the critically-acclaimed Blanc de Blancs Grand Cru vintage Champagne rolled out of its cellars in 2020, Porte Noire next set about creating a rosé.

After a trip to Provence, the duo chose Château Sainte Marguerite — a family-owned estate in Côtes de Provence — to supply grapes for what turned out to be “a mineral, crisp, refreshing, certified organic top-end Provence rosé.” Earning a 4.4 out of 5 stars from Vivino makes this bottle a solid deal at $28 retail; www.portenoire.co.uk.

Not to be outdone, the Circles and Sunflower hip-hop hitmaker Post Malone apparently pours a pretty solid rosé as well. Maison No. 9 is described as fruity and pleasant, and not too sweet, with wine.com’s tasting notes comparing the pink blush to “strolling through a pleasant garden.”

Malone himself said in a press release that, “Rosé is for when you want to get a little fancy. It’s a nice switch up.”

The pink punch sold out immediately in its initial release in 2020, but you can find it now at local retailers and at its website alongside all sorts of swag (including Maison No. 9 dog toys); maison9wine.com.

Further Reading

Moving onto the hard stuff, singer, songwriter, and dancer Jason Derulo’s Bedlam Vodka apparently offered the best combination of taste and value. The spirit has quite a rich history for only $21 a bottle. The ancestors of one of the company’s founders distilled the vodka from long-grain white rice during the potato famine over 170 years ago in Bedlam, Ireland. The family finally took this craft vodka to market a few years ago, debuting in only five states. Now, with Derulo’s backing, Bedlam is available for purchase online and in stores across the country; bedlamvodka.com/jasonderulo.

For a more complex liquor, Kendall Jenner is apparently rocking worlds with 818 Reposado Tequila. Earning an impressive 4.9 out of 5 stars at Distiller.com, the warm, honey-colored spirit is made from traditional methods — cooking agave plants in brick ovens for up to 40 hours and then crushing them using a tahona. The resulting double-distilled reposado tequila is aged in French oak barrels and blended with extra añejo tequila before bottling.

This elicits an aroma of peppers and herbs with “a lovely marzipan that carries underneath it all,” according to flaviar.com. 818’s flavor profile mixes in layers of brown butter, exotic spices, and streaks of caramel and marmalade. At $54 a bottle, the 818 Tequila isn’t cheap, but it’s spicy with a hint of sweet, like any reposado worth its weight; drink818.com.

Why, then, did Canadian rap star Drake come in last? His $39 bottles of Virginia Black American Whiskey received a failing 2.8 stars out of 5 on distiller.com. The description, however, doesn’t so much criticize the blend as to not extol it.

The whiskey is a blend of two, three, and four-year-old bourbons with a high rye content sourced from Midwest Grain Products of Indiana. Arriving in a well-dressed, dapper art deco glass bottle, Stephanie Moreno’s notes describe the whiskey as having a “vanilla smoked profile with a dollop of caramel.” Sweet on the tongue, Virginia Black apparently tastes like it smells. Described as “overall pleasant and easy to drink,” the whiskey doesn’t sound like a bad option to try if you’re into whiskeys on the sweet side. Coming from the land of maple leafs, we shouldn’t be surprised by this offering from Drake; virginiablackwhiskey.com.

Read More: Patrón and Hennessy NFT Offer Exclusive Spirits Via BlockBar

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Matthew Denis
Matt Denis is an on-the-go remote multimedia reporter, exploring arts, culture, and the existential in the Pacific Northwest…
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