This Sprawling Irish Estate Puts the ‘Man’ Into Mansion with Its Own Go-Kart Track

Page 1 of 14
1 of 14

As if we needed one more reason to cut all ties and move to Ireland. When you consider the landscape, the culture, the food, the beer, the liquor (yes, we count those as two separate categories), the healthcare, and now this glorious mansion (emphasis on “man”), the list is getting pret-ty, pret-ty long.

Combining all the best features of a medieval baron’s castle and a modern man-cave, this five-bedroom, four-bathroom, 6,900-square-foot home in the appropriately named county of Moneymore features … well, everything you want. We mean everything. Don’t believe us? Keep scrolling.

Just one look at the sweeping cobblestone entrance to this property and you’re going to throw away all your coffee table books on minimalism. The stately home occupies an elevated setting over the lush countryside of Ulster and is surrounded by 28 acres of pristinely maintained grounds.

Despite its seemingly isolated location, the property is just an hour’s drive from most major towns, as well as Belfast International and City airports. The adjacent helipad makes it extra easy to whip in and out of your country estate, whether you’re meeting your mates for a pint in the village or swinging into London or Edinburgh to catch a show.

Despite the palatial dimensions of the house, it’s really just a country cottage at heart. No Tony Soprano-esque interior design here — with honeyed oak flooring, exposed rafters, a glass-fronted fieldstone fireplace, and lots of big windows, this place feels like home right away.

Culinary snobs will swoon over the open-plan kitchen with its granite worktops, sleek storage and ceramic tile back-splashes. We’re especially smitten with the pairing of country formal styling with top-of-the-line stainless appliances. Soft claps.

Even with five bedrooms to select from, the master suite is appropriately baronesque. The vaulted ceiling, accented by exposed rafters, makes a perfect focal point for hanging your best taxidermy trophy. Two of the four other bedrooms feature en-suite bathrooms and dressing rooms. Now your guests will know precisely where they rank in your friendship roster.

The master lavatory (deserving of such a name) includes a luxurious circular tub, double vanity, a slate-tiled shower so big you could get lost in it, and a walk-in hot press. We had to look that one up, and it doesn’t refer to the venerable Irish culture mag run by Niall Stokes — it’s actually a heated storage space used to dry damp clothing. Which, in Ireland, seems like it should be a human right, doesn’t it?

Now we’re getting to the good stuff. First, the enclosed sun porch with its feature ceiling, sprawling views of the aforementioned manicured grounds, and double doors leading to a covered patio. Your parents will say it’s the perfect spot for sipping coffee in the morning and we won’t say they’re wrong … but we can’t help that the first thing we thought of was a Tullamore DEW-fueled rager. But to each their own.

Next, the cinema room, which includes provisions for overhead projector and entertainment system. Please don’t miss the accent window with its stained glass coat of arms.

Follow the hallway down from the cinema room and you’ll find yourself in the swimming pool complex. Enclosed by tinted windows (so you can get up to God knows what all in perfect privacy), the complex also features a hot tub, sauna, music system and feature lighting.

Okay, we admit it — we’ve buried the lede. All that other stuff is amazing, but the real reason you need to buy this house is the 980-meter go-kart track positioned just outside the house’s main entrance. MSA-approved and built to the latest operational specifications, this amenity is the stuff that dreams are made of. It’s also surrounded on three sides by a thick row of trees, keeping your shenanigans safe from the prying eyes of jealous neighbors.

In addition to all necessary flags, barriers and other accouterments, the go-kart track complex includes a race control office and a range of garage, parking, and workshop facilities, as well as an exterior viewing and patio area.

We could happily live in the race control office, with its reception area, suit room, kitchen and bathroom, briefing area (which makes it all seem so much more adult), and winners’ podium (which immediately does away with the adult factor).

Adjacent to the main track is a separate kids’ adventure complex, with a mini go-kart track, a forest walk, playground and picnic area. It’s the perfect way to convince your concerned parents that this isn’t a selfish purchase. It’s actually the perfect place to raise the family they keep pressuring you to start.

Rarely does the opportunity arise to acquire such an exquisite residence and leisure area in the Mid-Ulster Area … or anywhere. It’s offered at a starting price of over $2.8 million (£2.25 million) which, at the current exchange rate, is a pretty smokin’ deal.

If you should decide to make it your own, just remember we’re the ones who told you about it. (We’re fine with any bedroom, really.)

Page 1 of 14
Food & Drink

Would You Drink Whiskey Flavored by Beavers?

Castoreum is a substance excreted from a beaver's castor sac (located just under the tail) and is used in conjunction with urine to mark territory in the wild.
Fashion & Style

Get Ready for Fall With These Classic Oxford Shirts for Men

Casual versatility is the name of the game when it comes to Oxfords.
Food & Drink

The Cauldryn Is a Travel Mug That Does Everything

The Cauldryn is perfect for anyone who has experienced the let-down of cold coffee, the hassle of blended drinks, or the unique challenges of campfire cooking.

Art Museum or Ultra-Modern Home? This House is a Bit of Both.

Oak Pass is on a sprawling piece of land that is home to 130 Coast Live Oaks.

A Dying Forest Gets New Life as a Stunning Lake House

Clearing trees to preserve a forest, Desai Chia Architecture made the most of a beetle infestation.

This Tiny A-Frame Cabin Aims for Zero Environmental Impact

This unique space can be built on a property without a construction permit or the use of heavy machinery.

The Bothy Project Inspires a Hiking Hut Pre-Fab and Artists’ Retreat

We're just waiting for the bothy trend to finally come to the States.

Naked Labs’ 3D Body-Scanning Smart Mirror Tracks Fitness Progress in Real Time

Mirror mirror on the wall, what are my gains this week?

Travel All Over Without Ever Leaving Home in an ESCAPE Tiny House

The latest model comes with a screened-in porch the lets you enjoy the outdoors even more.

The Sheats-Goldstein Residence Is Everything We Want in a House

Even if you don’t know the name, you know the Sheats-Goldstein Residence.

Riviera Residence: A Mid-Century Modern Home is Brought into the 21st Century

A sleek white kitchen, exposed steel beams, and dark woods all give this 1950s home a decidedly 2018 look

Add Style (and Storage) to Your Space with these Exceptional Media Stands

You bought your big-ass TV. Now you need a place to put it.

This Brick House is Like Something Out of a Sci-Fi Movie

A drawbridge, an art gallery, 970,000 bricks — and those aren’t even the most impressive parts.

Take a Don Draper-Worthy Road Trip in this Vintage $225,000 RV

Everything from the unique shape down to the luxury finishes makes this fully restored travel trailer worth the price. It's even been signed by Chuck Pelly.