Even when traveling thousands of miles away from home, cultural differences still come as a surprise. As an American traveling to Europe, I naturally expected things to be a lot different than home — but ‘unconscious incompetence’ still can happen to the best of us. During a recent trip to Italy, I found myself attempting to make eye contact with our waiter after the meal was complete in an effort to request the bill.
After more and more time passed, it became apparent that the waiter was not going to bring the bill on his own, leaving me to get up and request it after an hour had passed. As tourists, we’re always in a rush — we want to get as much done in a short period of time while abroad. Yet, this ‘American’ nature conflicts with European cultural norms for dining, leaving us to adjust our dining habits to match the standard while traveling.
Cultural context
Dining culture in Europe is completely different in the U.S., leaving unprepared Americans with a lesson to learn. Firstly, dining out is considered a leisurely experience for many individuals in Europe, with a heavy focus on the experience itself. With that in mind, restaurant staff are not trained to rush guests out of their seats. Europeans like to take their time dining and have an unstated expectation that they can stay for as little or as long as they’d like.
Many restaurants also charge a “cover” charge for the seat, implying that the seat has been purchased and therefore guests can stay for as long as they want. By nature, the culture is more focused on the leisurely act of dining out, with a more relaxed lifestyle pace in comparison to the U.S. For this reason, it’s assumed that guests will get up from the table and request the bill when they’re ready to leave. As an American, if you don’t know this, you could find yourself waiting hours — as I did in Naples.
The difference in tipping culture between U.S. dining and European dining is also a key factor in these cultural differences. Servers at restaurants in Europe are paid an hourly wage and do not rely on tips as their sole source of income (as tipping on dining is not customary as it is in the U.S.). With this in mind, it makes sense why servers are not in a rush to “turn over” tables the same way that they are in the U.S. Rushing customers out of a restaurant would be seen as rude in Europe, whereas it’s almost expected in the U.S.
How it differs from U.S. dining culture
As an American visiting Europe, the stark differences in dining habits and culture can come as both a source of frustration and a wake-up call, depending on how you choose to look at it. When you’re used to the notoriously fast pace of U.S. culture, the concept of spending hours at a restaurant dining can seem like too much. This can cause frustration for U.S. travelers, especially when traveling with tight itineraries. After all, when you’ve traveled the distance to Rome, it’s only fair that you want to spend more time seeing the Roman Forum and the Colosseum and less time at a restaurant.
At the same time, the shocking difference in dining culture between the U.S. and Europe can also teach Americans a lesson to slow down and embrace a new culture. The slow-paced, leisurely lifestyle can also be embraced, serving as a lesson that life isn’t (and shouldn’t be) a race to the finish line. Although the differences can take some getting used to, it’s also worth embracing something new while you’re away from your own turf.
This shift in perspective doesn’t mean you need to spend four hours dining when you have plans for the day, but it does require an understanding and an appreciation for differences in culture. A lesson to remember for next time you’re traveling to Europe: If you’re truly in a rush to get somewhere, get up from your seat and approach the staff, kindly requesting that you wish to pay the bill. If you don’t request it, you could end up with more frustration than appreciation for this difference in dining habits.
