Skip to main content

Brave: Victor Cruz’s Honest Take on Bourbons and Turtle Racing

Kevin Mazur/Getty Images for NARAS

Ask former NFL wide receiver Victor Cruz for his honest pitch on turtle racing. “It’s the slowest two minutes you’ll ever watch,” he says. Read the wrong way, it’s not the most enthusiastic endorsement of the second-annual Old Forester Kentucky Turtle Derby, which takes place on Saturday, May 1, at 4 p.m. ET. But you have to see the tell, the upturned corner of the mouth — Cruz is in on the joke. And then, like Keyser Söze, poof, it’s gone. “When you look at these turtles and you see the way they’re shaped, their skillsets are unmatched,” he continues, straight-faced. “People don’t recognize how strong their grip is to the ground. They may be going slow, but they’re moving.”

Related Guides

Recommended Videos

Cruz, who retired in 2018 with his Super Bowl-winning New York Giants and a Pro Bowl credit already in the bank, is Old Forester’s first Turtle Derby “mascot,” which is a fun euphemism for the fact that he gets paid a ton of money to get people interested in a Kentucky Derby sideshow involving aquatic reptiles. (The Derby itself, which was first postponed and then canceled in 2020, takes place later on the same day as its Turtle counterpart.) To contract Cruz is essentially the equivalent of hiring Tony Romo to narrate the annual Puppy Bowl, a bazooka aimed at a mosquito. But that’s the fun of it, and for Cruz, with his NFL legacy unassailable, it’s all about fun.

Old Forester

Scroll through the 34-year-old’s Instagram, and life is filled with the spoils of a successful career: fast cars, azure skies, private planes, and empty beaches. The Turtle Derby, when viewed from the right angle, is more of the same: “This will be the introduction to [the Kentucky Derby] for me,” Cruz says. “When I think of the Derby, I think of the fashion. I’m excited to put some looks together, and I feel like you can take some risks.” Surprisingly, this will be his first time at the annual equestrian event — which is why the Turtle Derby’s mascot position was so interesting: “I had no idea there was a whole cultural background to it, so I’m definitely excited to open that up.”

One area Cruz is no stranger to is with bourbon itself, and Old Forester’s legacy within the category is as respectable as any. Launched in 1870 by a Kentucky-born pharmacist, the company claims to be the first bottled bourbon, which is a fancy way of saying that it was solely available in sealed bottles instead of in any container-like object that could hold a measure of liquid. But this early adoption was fortunate, as it ensured authenticity. Authenticity guaranteed quality, and after 150 years, the brand has essentially become synonymous with it. For Cruz, who’s grown accustomed to the finer things in life, it’s a perfect match. “I can attach myself to this because it tastes great and there’s a level of luxury there,” he says.

In fitting style with this tradition of quality, Cruz eschews mixed drinks and even ice. Instead, he’s a man that takes it straight: “A nice double, neat, and I just sip the night away,” he says.

Old Forester

But while we both could use a drink as we talk turtles, we’re both sober this early in the morning. And so The Manual asks Cruz for his honest assessment of the second-annual turtle tradition.

On Saturday, the odds-on favorite of the eight-terrapin field is Moe Lassus, a competitor with the pedigree and pre-season dominance required of a champ. With sound fundamentals and a hunger to win, he’s the bettors’ favorite. Pardon My Mulch is also a strong contender, though Cruz views him as green and still a year or two away from the title. “Kind of like when Lebron was right there but couldn’t get over the hump,” he says. But the dark horse, the wild card, the long shot, has to be with Steve, 2020’s third-place finisher. “He doesn’t have a fancy name, he doesn’t have a backstory. He’s just Steve,” Cruz says of the former bronze winner of last year’s event. “So he’s focused, but there’s not a lot of pressure.”

Admittedly, it’s hard to handicap a field of turtles. While there are miniature spectators, there are no jockeys, and goading is strictly against the rules. If last year is any reliable guide of Saturday’s race, early leads melt faster than ice in a Kentucky spring. If you’re lucky enough to secure odds with a sports book, you’ll need to tune in on Saturday to find out for sure.

It’s not lost on Cruz the absurdity of all of this. He ran a 4.4-second 40-yard dash, and now he’s being asked to speculate on a turtle race broadcast via YouTube. Puns abound, chaos rules, and most competitors seem desperate to get away rather than aim for any finish lines. “Pretty much my entire life was based on speed and eluding people, and to now be the host and the mascot for a competition that’s geared around going as slow as physically possible . . .” He trails off.

“But I’m fortunate enough to be in a position to experience these opportunities,” Cruz continues. “I am a little surprised that I’ve gone from winning a Super Bowl and dancing in the end zone to talking about the Old Forester Kentucky Turtle Derby, but it all comes full circle.”

Jon Gugala
Features Writer
Jon Gugala is a freelance writer and photographer based in Nashville, Tenn. A former gear editor for Outside Magazine, his…
The Pitt season 2: Everything we know so far
The second season is coming just a year after the first one debuted
Noah Wyle in the Pitt

Over the course of its remarkable first season, few shows have done more to earn a fanbase than The Pitt. The Max Original, which is set in a Pittsburgh emergency room and told over the course of a single shift, hour by hour, is both an old-fashioned medical drama and a modern look at all the ways that American systems are crumbling.

After the first season wrapped up on April 10, many are eager to learn more about a second season. After all, The Pitt is the kind of show that seems like it could run forever. Here's what we know about the show's second season so far:

Read more
Will we be getting a Black Mirror season 8?
The anthology series just debuted its seventh season on Netflix.
Paul Giamatti in Black Mirror

Following the debut of Black Mirror's seventh season on Netflix, attention has naturally turned to whether we'll be getting any more stories from the mind of creator Charlie Booker. Black Mirror has become one of Netflix's biggest successes, but the show has not officially been renewed for an eighth season yet.

Although the show hasn't been renewed by Netflix yet, Booker has made it clear that it's not because he's out of ideas. "Yes, there are some stories that are pretty much fully baked and ready to go," he told The Hollywood Reporter. "And there are others where I've got chunks of story or concept that I'm just slightly trying to work out."

Read more
Benedict Cumberbatch and Olivia Colman go to war in the first trailer for ‘The Roses’
This story has already been adapted into a feature film once.
Benedict Cumberbatch and Olivia Colman in The Roses

Anytime you get two heavyweight actors together and ask them to do battle on screen, the results are almost guaranteed to be electrifying. That's certainly what the first trailer for The Roses promises. The movie, which is adapted from Warren Adler's 1981 novel The War of the Roses, stars Benedict Cumberbatch and Olivia Colman as a married couple whose relationship disintegrates over the course of the film.

The two play Theo and Ivy, a married couple living an idyllic California life. When Theo's career crumbles just as Ivy's is taking off, though, buried resentments in their relationship come to the surface. Andy Samberg, Allison Janney, Ncuti Gatwa, Kate McKinnon, Sunita Mani, Jamie Demetriou, Zoë Chao and Belinda Bromilow are also in the cast. It was directed by Jay Roach.

Read more