Affordable luxury: how to spoil her without breaking the bank this Valentine’s day

Guys need to read more. Every time I start doomscrolling on TikTok or Instagram, the BookTok world is almost exclusively curated for women. That is why we need to start pushing our love for the bang-bang shoot-’em-ups. The debonair spy. The man on his own, cut off from all help, with only his skills and his wits to help him overcome the obstacles between him and his mission. As men, we love these escapes from the mundane lives and diving into the hero fantasy we all have. When women talk about the mental load they carry every day, men are usually creating our own mental load with safety and security: “What would I do if someone attacked from here? Or there?” Really, what we’re asking is, “What would Jason Bourne do?”

I tend to live in this place in my head when I need to escape from the world, but it is more fun to read about it. As the weather begins to turn and our evenings and weekends are colder and darker, we need something to occupy our time to get us from now until we can escape to the great outdoors in the spring. Here are some action and adventure book recommendations to get your heart going and quench that hero fantasy without doing anything dangerous.

This is not a knock on public school. I went to public school. I liked public school. There is a system of life training built into the social fabric of school where we learn a lot about ourselves and the lives we are about to live. But the truth is we don’t learn a lot about life from the actual curriculum in the classroom. We learn that Paul Revere rode through the streets to alarm everyone that the British were coming. We learned that A squared plus B squared equals C squared. We even learned what an electron is. But there are precious little practical life lessons you can take with you. For me, I picked a lot of those through movies (a lot of parents are shaking their heads right now, but don’t knock it completely; there is a lot you can learn from movie perspectives) and my time in the United States Army.

The military teaches you a ton of practical life skills that will elevate your life when applied to your day-to-day. Here are five of them with a couple bonuses at the end.

There are moments in movies that stand the test of time. They are the first thing we think of when someone uses a turn of phrase or references something that sends your brain down the rabbit hole of movie quotes. These become cultural stalwarts and embed themselves into the very collective consciousness of our society. Some become known for certain industries. Wanna know what law enforcement is like? Check out Training Day or End of Watch. Wanna know what being a firefighter is like? Press play on Backdraft. How about military life? Full Metal Jacket, Jarhead, or Officer and a Gentleman. Want realism? Don’t watch any of them. But what about sales? There are a dozen movies that can teach you how to sell. Boiler Room. The Wolf of Wall Street. But none of them are as iconic as Glengarry Glen Ross. In fact, one scene in that movie every salesman should watch. Blake’s 8-minute tongue-lashing at the office underachievers.

Alec Baldwin took less than ten minutes to cement himself in the lexicon of sales mentors. Walking into the office, he looks at Ed Harris, Jack Lemmon, and Alan Alda and rips them to shreds when one pours himself some coffee.