Tired of Dodging Bullets at Work? Check Out This Bulletproof Briefcase
Are you tired of being pelted by a deluge of gunfire on your way to work? Tell us about it. Nothing can give you a case of the Mondays faster than a slug to the chest. Fortunately, the heroes at the Force Training Institute have you covered.
The MTS™ Multi-Threat Shield –also called the “Savior”– is a totally usable briefcase that doubles as a bulletproof shield. That’s right — in addition to carrying your neglected TPS reports, this briefcase can STOP A FREAKING BULLET. According to the Force Training Institute website, the Savior can be “deployed” (read: opened) in seconds to provide 639 square inches of protection against ballistics.
This briefcase is made of 1680 Denier ballistic nylon and laminated Kevlar, and comes with blunt force inserts. Together, these materials can handle anything up to a .44 magnum round. In short, it’s a pretty tough bag.
This potential life-saver weighs just 8 lbs., which is not bad considering it can STOP A FREAKING BULLET. All you have to do is open the top, and suddenly you have a 3-foot long shield. The base model will protect you against handguns and “pistol-caliber sub-machine gun threats,” as well as attacks from blunt and edged weapons.
If you want protection against high-powered rifles, you’ll need to spring for the Level III insert plate, which is sold separately. For protection from a Tomahawk cruise missile, you’ll need a bigger briefcase.
Oh yeah, we almost forgot: the Savior can also be used as a briefcase, with plenty of space for your laptop, tablet, documents, 92FS Beretta, and whatever else you need for the average workday. It also has a handle and shoulder strap for convenient carrying. At $899, the Savior is a bit on the steep side for a briefcase, but it’s about right for a briefcase that can STOP A FREAKING BULLET.
Whether you’re lobbying for “007” as your new office nickname or you want to give new meaning to the term “white-collar crime,” the Savior could be a good fit for you. All we ask is that you don’t go looking for trouble; for example, you probably shouldn’t call your boss a punk and/or ask if he feels lucky.
MTS™ Multi-Threat Shield — $899 on the Force Training Institute’s website